Thursday, February 12, 2009

I'm a Mystery "Writer," by Jess Lourey

Like most writers, I heart punctuation. Well, at least if it's used correctly. Misused punctuation hurts. The worst? When people put two spaces after a period, which is technically a formatting rather than punctuation error (you know who you are; you learned how to type on a typewriter instead of a computer). The best? When a guy uses a semicolon correctly in a love letter. Hot, hot, hot. Well, punctuation geeks, we are not alone. Check out my new favorite "blog": The "Blog" of "Unnecessary" Quotation Marks.

This is a potpourri blog post by the way, a threefer, and number two (intentional) is this: my good friend Michelle just shared with me a word she invented after a particularly intense rest stop experience. The word is prestenchination, loosely based on the Christian concept of predestination, and it refers to the fact that if you are in a public bathroom and have eight empty stalls to choose from, you will inevitably enter the stinkiest one.

And finally, number three is this video, which briefly presents the real story of how a spark becomes a novel:

See how much I do for you? It's because I'm a natural educator. Feel free to enter the conversation at any of the levels I've provided: 1) your favorite punctuation, 2) poop, or 3) is this similar to your book publishing experience? I know it mirrors mine.

16 comments:

Anonymous said...

Gee, I thought I was the only one on the planet who objected to double spacing after a period. When I've pointed it out in the past I've met resistance, as though I'm violating some hidebound rule. I think what I'm violating is yet another unconsidered habit, a habit learned in the age of typewriters and never reflected on since. I've set my word processor to display spacing marks, carriage returns, and the like. Then I have very satisfying sessions removing the double spaces after periods that people have left in the hundreds of documents I read in a week at the office.

G.M. Malliet said...

The Oscar Wilde quote that makes every writer smile:

"I have spent most of the day putting in a comma and the rest of the day taking it out."

Jessica Lourey said...

Keep fighting the good fight, Paul!

Jessica Lourey said...

Isn't the truth, Gin? You can see how it would take someone years to write a book....

Joanna Campbell Slan said...

Ah, Jess, you are definitely one-of-a-kind. I know a guy who sprinkles commas over his work like most folks add salt. Very seasonal. Have you read "Eats, Shoots and Leaves?"

Cricket McRae said...

Prestenchination is a craptacular word! In a "good" way, of course.

Jessica Lourey said...

Probably, Joanna, that's why I'm single on Valentine's Day yet again. ;) I have Eats, Shoots and Leaves on my shelf at work, but I have yet to crack it. I keep meaning to assign it to my students so that I have to read it.

Jessica Lourey said...

Whee for craptacular words, Cricket! Or, if we were classy, we'd call them "scatological," but there's already too many classy women in this world. I prefer to take the low road every now and again. Definitely more fun down here.

G.M. Malliet said...

On the subject of that spacing thing...isn't single spacing after a period something that was handed down to us by the advertising world? It simply looks better, visually, to close up spaces, so I think it's something that came into general use via the graphic artists and Mad. Ave.

Now, if we could get them to use something larger than six-point gray type (usually on a dark gray background) that could become very poopular. ;-)

Jessica Lourey said...

Yay for working in the scatology, Gin!

I don't know about the one space and advertising thing. I was taught to type on a typewriter, where you hit the space bar twice after ending-sentence punctuation. However, I was told that computers are set up to "read" when a sentence ends, and to automatically program the space bar to make 1 1/2 spaces at the end of a sentence. So, if a person hits the space bar twice after a period, question mark, or exclamation point when they're on a computer, they're actually spacing 2 1/2 spaces, which is a huge, gaping chasm of white. We cannot poopulate our writing with those sorts of errors. Unforgivable.

Alan Orloff said...

The "unnecessary" "puncutation" "blog" is "most" "excellent"

And "I" thought my "punctuation" was "funky!"

Thanks for pointing "it" out!

Alan O.

Jessica Lourey said...

I agree, Alan. That blog is a "hoot."

Keith Raffel said...

Oh you youngsters! I cannot help putting two spaces after a period. Call me a Luddite all you want!

Jessica Lourey said...

Luddite. And the search and replace function on Word will clean that up for you.

Julia Buckley said...

Keith, I too space twice after a period. Jess has exposed an error I didn't even know I was committing. :0

That video confirmed all of my suspicions about publicity and marketing. And now I know why my books aren't selling--I'm not taking the full ten to thirty years to write them. :)

Jessica Lourey said...

I KNOW, Julia!!! Ten-thirty years. Jeez Louise. If you only wrote a sentence a day, you'd still have a pretty thick book in five years. The other 5-25 years must be about tightening the plot.