If This Is A Delusion, Please Don't Wake Me Up!

As an author I spend an awful lot of time in Fantasyland. When I’m writing, that world seems just about as real this one. Remembering which world I’m in is important, but sometimes I get confused. Driving past Arastradero Road in the foothills above Palo Alto, I can say to someone, “Oh, this is where Rowena got run down.” And that someone can reply, “Oh, how sad, but, um, who’s Rowena?” And then I remember she’s a character in that other world which exists only in my mind and in the mind of readers of Smasher.

Now, though, I am really confused.

I’ve told friends that I just wanted the Giants to win the World Series before I die. Last night I watched TV and I think I saw them win their fourth game. Really? Am I still in Fantasyland?



I grew up watching the Giants finish in 2nd place five straight seasons despite the presence of such baseball deities as Willie Mays and Juan Marichal. I was in the stands at Candlestick just before game 3 of the World Series when the Loma Prieta Earthquake struck. In 2002 I was not surprised when the Giants were up five runs only six outs away from winning the Series and still managed to lose to the Angels.

This lifelong experience with the Giants has colored my outlook on life. Something bad is always ready to snatch away consummation of your dream. This world-view might be what drove me to writing fiction. In Fantasyland I can control what happens.

So now I am still dazed. Did the Giants win or am I as delusional as ever? Ever an optimist, today I’m going up to San Francisco to watch the Giants' victory parade.

If this is a delusion, don’t wake me up!

Keith

P.S. I received a text message from my agent last night right after the last out: “Now you can die in peace.” I replied, “Please not yet.” And he hastened to text back, “No, no, first a deal [on your next book] and grandchildren.” (Considering I still have an 11-year old child at home, that could be awhile.)