A Small Life In A Big World

In the past few weeks, while watching the change of power in Egypt, other protests in the Middle East, and the tap dancing of our own government as it weighs both short-term and long-term ramifications of current events, I was often reminded of one of my favorite movie lines:

“I live a small life. Well, valuable but small. And sometimes I wonder, do I do it because I like it or because I haven’t been brave?”

The above line is typed into an e-mail by Kathleen Kelly, the book store owner played by Meg Ryan in You’ve Got Mail.

World news makes me feel very small. In my nearly six decades on this planet – an infinitesimal speck, if even that, in the overall scheme of things – I have witnessed the assassinations of JFK, RFK and Martin Luther King, Jr. Watched in horror as a space shuttle exploded on TV in real time. Viewed thousands of New Yorkers fleeing for their lives as two giant towers toppled to the ground. I have watched race riots on TV both as a kid and as an adult and saw the fall of the Berlin Wall. I’ve followed the news as one regime after another fell to or prevailed over protesters, as one dictator took the place of another, as wars were fought and use of nuclear weaponry threatened.

When hurtling towards my next book deadline or juggling several large projects at the office, it’s easy to think of current events unfolding half a world away as not being relevant to my life. After all, my life is small. Valuable, but small. But in doing that I am not being very wise and certainly not very brave. What happened in Egypt will have a bearing on my life. It may not be immediately evident as to how, but it will and does matter. Each time history takes a sharp turn, even us little guys going about our lives cloaked in bored contentment will eventually feel the ripple.

If there is one regret I have at this moment, it’s that I wish I were brave enough to tackle some of life’s more serious issues in my books. Sure, I battle weight prejudice in my Odelia Grey mysteries, but I mean topics I could really sink my teeth into, writing words that would leave readers breathless and evaluating their own beliefs.

I wish I were brave enough to upset the apple cart, stand on it and yell another favorite movie line, this one from Network:

"I'm as mad as hell, and I'm not going to take this anymore!"


Note: Alas, this is my last blog enty for Inkspot. I have been on this blog for years and have enjoyed it greatly, but with growing demands on my time, I have decided to bow out and let a fresher face take my place.  You can continue to read my occassional blog posts at Criminal Minds and at Babble 'n Blog.


Sue Ann Jaffarian
www.sueannjaffarian.com
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