Stranger than fiction

So this month I've been crazy busy with signings, conference appearances, and travel. In fact im writing this post in a hotel room on an ipad... And i have no idea how to do the picture thing to add to the post on this gadget, so you will all have to seriously use your imaginations.

This promotional stuff isn't cheap...as you mentioned, Jenna. And Lois, as you so humorously shared with us, truth is ALWAYS stranger than fiction. So last weekend I was in Florida at Disney, in a far too expensive resort hotel attending a small lesbian writing conference. We have about 150 people attend every year, so we were definitely teeny fish in a very large koi pond.

So the first thing I notice is that this humongous hotel has a great number of conference rooms and the hotel was absolutely maximizing the use of their conference space. Along with us, we crossed paths with a conference of pregnant women. I'm not sure what they were talking about, maybe the best breathing techniques or treatments for chafed baby bottoms. Then as we went down a set of escalators, a new conference was setting up. Sure enough, that sign DID read Annual Meeting of Funeral Directors. This came complete with a room specially equipped to handle vendor displays of the latest in coffins and hearses. Nothing like walking by the room and seeing caskets propped open, just waiting to be filled. Of course, morbid curiosity overcame me and a couple friends one evening when we were coming in from a late supper. No one was around, and the doors to the vendors room of death were closed. Being, shall we say, intrepidly inquisitive, I tried the doors. To my surprise, they popped right open. One of the gals I was skulking around with whipped out her camera and started taking pictures. Just as the flashes began going off, this guy, all dressed like The Men In Black, complete with FBI earpiece, bursts from a door not far away and comes charging right for us. All we could make out before we ran for our very lives was him yelling into his lapel mike, "C3 to base, we have a breach." Needless to say, we busted a move and got our fannies out of there.

The next day, the Boy Scouts moved in on one side of our vendor area. A meeting a physicians filled the space on our other side. Too bad they weren't around a couple of days later when a few of our members were stricken with food poisoning.

The day before we were finished, the hotel came and rudely kicked us out of our vendor area. The same vendor area we were contracted to have throughout the following day. After a heated verbal exchange between the hotel and our con director, the conference bookstore and seven other vendors were kicked to the curb and forced to re-set up in a room that was even further away from the breakout rooms. This was done so a huge wedding could move in where we had been. Then a few drunk attendees of said wedding threatened to come and teach us a lesson. After some very non-veiled threats by one of our board members to the wedding planner, everything remained calm, and no one wound up in any of the display coffins.

So, in the space of four days, I think I have witnessed enough unbelievable, yet true fodder for three or four new books! Reality is absolutely way way way more crazy than fiction ever could be!!!!

Lucky Cats or Cat’s Meow?

Authors are often asked for writing advice, but so far only a couple people have asked for mine. Good thing, because until this week, I didn’t have any unique advice. But I just returned from a vacation in Disney World, where dreams come true, and here’s my advice for aspiring writers:

Buy a Lucky Cat.

Three years ago I purchased my first Lucky Cat at the Japan Pavilion in Disney World’s EPCOT Center. The Lucky Cat has a history of more than 500 years in Japan, where people love them as mascots of good fortune and happiness. The painted, wooden cats are often placed at the entrance to a home or in store windows, and they come in ten colors, all with different associated good fortune, and are about an inch tall. In 2007 I selected the white cat, which brings good luck and happiness, hoping to find an agent for my debut novel, For Better, For Murder. I brought the cat home and placed it in a window near our front door. My agent called a few months later and subsequently sold my book—and its sequel.

Last week I returned to the Japan Pavilion and purchased the black cat, which protects from illness and evil spirits, and the gold cat, which makes dreams come true and brings good luck in wealth. When I arrived home from vacation, I learned For Better, For Murder was a 2009 Agatha Award Finalist for Best First Novel.

Now, normally I’m not into lucky talismans or magic or any sort of folderol, but I see a connection. What writer doesn’t dream of getting an agent or writing an award worthy book? That’s twice now I’ve visited Disney World, where dreams come true, and purchased Lucky Cats, only to have my dreams come true.

Yes, a trip to Disney was part of the connection too, but my vacation was the reason I missed two phone calls attempting to notify me of the Agatha nomination. And I’ve visited Disney other times. So I’m thinking the cats alone will do the trick. Plus, aren’t cats often associated with traditional or cozy mystery novels? See, another connection! Hey, right or wrong, I believe in my Lucky Cats.

More importantly, many thanks to the people who nominated my book for an Agatha. They made this dream come true, and to me, they will always be the cat’s meow!

Chilly Disney World, Here We Come

by Felicia Donovan

It has been many years since I ventured to the Magic Kingdom, but off I go in a few days along with my best friend and her family.

Ahhhh...an escape from the cold New England weather that has hovered around a high of twenty degrees for many days. Visions of shorts, sandals and t-shirts crept into my head as I began the arduous task of planning what to pack...until I checked the weather reports.

What? Sixty degrees with an evening low of forty and clouds? My friend's extended family is already in Florida and quickly issued this caution - pack the kids' winter coats and gloves. Seriously?

Just a few years ago I was in Orlando in March and my own children opted out of some of the Disney attractions to linger in the luxurious hotel pool because it was so warm.

Okay, Mickey, Belle, Ariel, Cinderella and the lot of you. I've heard Disney can make it snow at Christmastime, so how about using some of that good ol' Disney magic and cranking it up another ten degrees? Not that I'm complaining, mind you, because friends assure me you don't want to be there when it's ninety, but a pleasant and sunny seventy degrees would be a nice change from what we're experiencing in the Northeast.

I'm open for advice on what to pack given the conditions if any of you experienced Disney fans want to share. And yes, that's me in the picture with my Mickey ears having just returned from a visit.