Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Oh, @%&^


She's done! The weeks of research, the months of writing, the weeks of typing, the month of editing, it's all done! She is ready to be read by my wonderful Beta testers who will see how splendiferous she is! Huzzah!

Three Weeks Later...

Oh, @%&^. They hated it. They thought the main character was annoying. The male lead was too perfect (meaning no real man would act like that). I kept switching between too much description and too much telling and not showing. The entire first fifty pages were dull and not needed. And the grammar! Oy! Didn't they teach you anything at the baby Ivy college you went to? (Yes, that watching Frat boys play beer pong is not how I want to spend my Friday nights, thank you very much).
Well, did you like anything? Yes. The chapter titles were funny.
Anything else? I liked the character names.

@%&^

What do you do when what you've written isn't that great? Me, there was vodka and three Real Housewives marathons involved. (Kidding about the vodka.) It's hard hearing criticism about something that you spent so much time and effort on. When they're telling me their constructive criticism, I try to put on a brave face while inside I'm considering skewering them with a fireplace poker. (Once again kidding. It was a machete.) Then I watch more Real Housewives, calm down, and think about what they've said and the suggestions they give. Like how to make the hero less of an archetype. Make the heroine have faults instead of her being little miss perfect. See how much of the beginning can be cut away without losing the characterization and world building you presented in those pages to get to the action quicker. Use a thesaurus as much as possible. When in doubt, use a comma. Really ask if you need to describe the leaves on the trees. Then put on your big girl pants and get back to work. (Unless there's a Real Housewives of Atlanta on. Love me some Kim and NeNe.) With every word on the page ask if this is the best choice. Sound like fun? About as much fun as Andy Cohen has at the Housewives reunions. (I think I have a problem.)

Writing is @%&^#*! hard work. Most of my books have gone through at least five edits before I even present it to my agent, who does one more. Right now I'm on the third of the steampunk book I wrote, cutting the first chapter entirely, working eight hours on the current first chapter, twelve on the second, and so on. My main character went from Cher Horowitz in Clueless to a pretty version of Jane Eyre. My hero now smokes, drinks, cusses, and is rude. There is more red ink on the pages than black. As it should be. Nothing comes out of the gate perfect, but if you're smart enough and trust in your skills and vision it can certainly get pretty close.

Publishers are tough. They want something that is come out of the box ready to even consider publishing it. I once got rejected because two character names were too similar and the reader got confused. So though it may hurt, and take bloody forever, editing is probably the most important part of writing. I've learned that 80% of the time my Beta testers are right. As long as you have the backbone of the story and halfway decent characters with potential then all is not lost. Most things can be fixed. And after all the hard work and tears, in the end you get this...

Gotta go! Those Housewives of Beverly Hills won't watch themselves! Oh, and I have some editing to do. :P Till next time!


8 comments:

Vicki Doudera said...

Jennifer, you are so right! the editing's a &@#$%!!!

Lois Winston said...

Jennifer, just remember what "they" say: If it were easy, everyone would be doing it. Hang in there! And really, girl, get some help for that Housewives addiction. ;-D

Shannon said...

Jennifer, never joke about vodka.

Darrell James said...

What Shannon said!

Beth Groundwater said...

Great post, Jennifer, and so true! And after reading your voice on this post, how can anyone resist going out and getting a copy of Mind Over Monsters to read. :)

Jennifer Harlow said...

Y'all are so sweet!

Kathleen Ernst said...

Congrats on the new book! You're right, this biz is tough. Now you get to celebrate your accomplishment--and tenacity.

Sebastian Stuart said...

tres droll! it's not just editing, life in general is a #!*^<!!

but not as big a bitch as Camille Grammer. She bugs me! In fact I have to watch every episode twice just to confirm how much she bugs me.

totally fun post!