Thursday, January 31, 2008

Your Time Machine Question

February 1, 2008

I'm stealing an idea from John Scalzi's blog because his responses were so interesting.


You invent a time machine and go back to your 15-year-old self. What do you tell yourself?

Come on everybody. Participate.


Mark Terry


Sue Ann Jaffarian said...

To my 15 yr old self:

"Eat less, exercise more and lose the virginity earlier."

Sue Ann Jaffarian said...

Ooops, less you all mistakeningly think from that comment that I was a teenage ho - I was a very late bloomer.

Anonymous said...

Cheer up. You're really not going to die before you get out of high school.

pattinase (abbott) said...

Stop smoking immediately. And make your Mom stop too.

Mark Combes said...

Drop out, get your GED, hop a freighter and skid the ocean - but first ask out Sue Ann.......

Nina Wright said...

You're going to make a lot of mistakes.

And you'll recover.

spyscribbler said...

Focus more.

Keith Raffel said...

I won't be able to consider my answer till I stop laughing.

Erica Orloff said...

DOn't marry that guy who asks you on the first date. That will NOT be one of your wisest moves, kid.

Then again . . . I have my oldest daughter to show for it. And the journey unfolds how it's supposed to.

Aimless Writer said...

Don't marry until you're 30.
Finish college before doing any of the above.
Only marry a college graduate.
Love many
Trust few
Always paddle
Your own canoe.
Get out of Jersey (soon to be changing its name to Taxjersey) before its too late.

Aimless Writer said...

Oh wait! I want to include what Sue ann said; lose the virginity earlier, too.

Mark Terry said...

At the risk of screwing up a life that I love:

First, stop staring at my head. Shaving your head is in and besides, what choice did I have?

Second, your Mom and Dad have a lot of conservative hang-ups about food, sex and money. They don't need to be your hang-ups.

Your Mom and Dad are hypochondriacs. But that can work both ways, so when your Dad gets cancer and keeps telling everybody it's no big deal, know this: he's lying. You can't do anything about it be there. Tell Pete that, too--loudly. Beth takes on too much of the burden.

And finally, your first employer will encourage you into a EE savings bond program. It's a waste. Take the money and invest in Microsoft and Apple. You'll thank me later.

Josephine Damian said...

Don't waste another minute of your life on these boys, put all your time, energy, and focus on writing.

Go to Temple University in spite of mother's objections. Move out of parents' house as soon as you can.

Bill Cameron said...

Help Sue, and if the plumbing is compatible, Aimless Writer out.

Don't believe any of the things the grad students say in Creative Writing 421/521. They are SOOOOO fulla shit.

Fall in love with an athletic pass time ASAP, and never fall out. Trust me on this one.

When you're about 22 and the baby is screaming, you're dead broke, you can't find a job or sell a piece of writing to save your life, and you're resenting breeding so young, just step back and take a deep breath. She's more than worth it.

Sue Ann Jaffarian said...

Sorry, Bill and Mark C, but I want to date Mark T. After all, he'll be one of the first investors of MS and Apple. But then again, so will I, because I'm taking his advice.

Oh, and I might also invest in Google while I'm at it.

Bill Cameron said...

What if I invest in Google and stuff too?

Mark Combes said...

It's all about the money with you chicks isn't it? :)

Hey, I've got more hair than Mark #1 - okay, not much more but I'm just sayin'.....

Mark Terry said...

Help me out on this one!

Joe Moore said...

Help me out on this one!"

Sorry, Mark1. I'm not going down the "hair" road. Those days are long gone. But, my advice to myself at age 15? Write a book about Jesus getting married and having his bloodline extend right up to the present. And call it THE MICHELANGELO CIPHER or something catchy like that.

Sumit said...

'Talk to your Dad NOW! He'll be no more when you are 16' :((

Felicia Donovan said...

Phew, I'm coming into this a bit late and am blown away not only by all the advice, but all the things I did wrong.

To my 15-year old self:

"Chill out. Life is the only school you need to get an "A+" in and you get that by living all you can. Find out who this girl Sue Ann is and hang out with her because obviously she knows how to have a good time!"

Charles Gramlich said...

Only one thing to say to my 15 year old self. "Girls like bad boys."

Mark Terry said...

Gee, Joe,
I was also considering telling my 15-old-self to write a book about an 11-year-old who discovers he's a wizard and call it something catchy like, "Henry Palmer and the Wizard's Stone."

Anonymous said...

Advice to my 15 yr old self:

"Be yourself and all will be fine."

Sue Ann Jaffarian said...

Advice to my 55 year old self:

Drop 100 lbs and become a cougar.

And woooooooo who, Charles, where were you when I was young and impressionable?

Aimless Writer said...

Re: Is it all about money with you chicks.

Yes, first time was for love, now we know its all about money.

Candy Calvert said...

You cannot "fix" anyone--stop trying, and spend time learning (and loving) who YOU really are. Pollyanna is not a healthy role model.

If you must marry that kid down the street, step on his neck from the get-go!

G.M. Malliet said...

Note to 15-year-old self: Don't let anyone else define you. The sky really is the limit.

Merry Monteleone said...

To my 15 year old self:

Being quick isn't a good excuse to be cruel - the only regrets you'll carry are in the people you hurt, and you will, just say you're sorry right away, with more than words when you can...

Also, writing is not a pipe dream and even if it were, you're not getting it out of your system... Don't fool around with other career paths, declare it now and follow through - you'll save yourself a lot of time and wasted aggravation.

Melanie Avila said...

To my 15-year old self:

Geometry won't define the rest of your life & you'll become a designer without it.

Keep writing.

Steer clear of that senior who catches you eye & stick with the guy your age.


Southern Writer said...

When Mother found out you smoked, and slapped you so hard you thought your head would fall off, she was right. Quit now.

Don't go see The Exorcist.

Your dad will turn out to be a nice guy, after all.

That gorgeous guy with the beard really is the one. Stop him from going to the lake on Father's Day, because he will die there.

Don't move so often, or so far. Seeing the world is fun, but you can never replace the good times you'll miss with friends. You can't get that time back, and it will be one of your greatest regrets.

Things will happen in life that you could never conceive of, or ever believe. Crazy stuff. When they happen, write about them.

And breathe. Just breathe.

Nadine said...

Stop worrying and start living. Spend more time doing the stuff you love and less time trying to fit in with everyone else.

Nadine said...

Another addition:

No matter what anyone tells you, high school is not the best four years of your life. Life gets much much better.

Anonymous said...

Sorry this is late, but I love this idea! :)

To my 15 year old self:

When you tell that high school counselor that you want to major in journalism and history and he tells you that you'll only be able to be a teacher and usually men are history teachers, don't listen to him AND step on his neck!!

Your summer reading of that lusty novel will inspire you to write your own stories. DON'T wait until you're in your 40's to do something about it.